The Beast's Birth Story: Part 1

Because these things should be written down for posterity's sake, I'm gonna tell you the story of how the Beast was born.  Not so much the gory details, but I'm going to warn you, there may be some...

C-guy and I in all my large 8 1/2 month pregnancy glory.  See those pants? I had two pairs in black, one in gray, and one in purple.  They were pretty much the only thing I could fit into that was comfortable and warm.  I know I live in Arizona but it can still get pretty chilly here (sometimes) and I had nothing warm and comfy to wear since my other pregnancies were all during the hot months (aka April through November)

The Beast is my third child.  They say that with each birth the baby comes faster and faster, and boy they're not kidding.  It was the 23rd of December when I had, what would be, my last doctor's appointment.  My husband came with me to the appointment.  We put my packed bag in the car in hopes that the doctor would tell us, "Wow, you're really progressing!  You need to go to the hospital right away!"  Ya, she didn't say that.  I was however progressing.  I'd dilated another centimeter and a half (I was now 4 1/2 centimeters).  But I still wasn't in active labor.  My due date wasn't until January 8th.  I had already done the calculations in my head and figured out that if the little one came two weeks early, (following in his siblings footsteps) then he would be born on Christmas day.  I didn't want a Christmas baby.  I wanted to be with my other kids on Christmas and I wanted this baby to have a birthday that he didn't have to share with the Savior of the World, so I decided to take matters into my own hands.  I looked the doctor square in the eye and said, "Strip em'!" (my membranes that is).  So she did.  A few times.  It hurt.  Like really, really bad.  I wanted her to stop, but I wanted that baby out of my body more so I let her keep going till she had decided I'd had enough.  Then she cleaned me up and sent me home.  SHE SENT ME HOME.  It's right about here in the story that I should tell you we live a good 20 minutes away from the hospital with NO TRAFFIC.  We got home from the doctor's appointment and picking up our kids at 3:00 pm.  The Beast arrived in this world at 8:24 pm.  5 hours.  5 hours, people.  That was it.  And my labor was even shorter than that.

To Be Continued.....


(Next in the Beast's Birth Story Installment:  How a pirated copy of New Moon helped put me into labor.  I tell you Jacob + no shirt + werewolf = full on active labor.  EVERY TIME!)